Costly Love and Lasting Fruit

Costly Love and Lasting Fruit

Scripture: John 15:1–17 Date: 5/10/26

15 “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in me, he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. 7 If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. 9 As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. 11 These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.

12 “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15 No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. 17 These things I command you, so that you will love one another.

In honor of Mother’s Day, I want to start off with a legendary song. It was written in 1982 by Larry Henley and Jeff Silbar. It was a beautiful song about a life of quiet sacrifice, and a few artists recorded it… but honestly, it didn’t go anywhere. It was mostly unknown.

In 1988, a movie was produced about two women—C.C. Bloom and Hillary Whitney—who meet as young girls and remain lifelong friends despite having very different lives. One is an actor and singer and the other a lawyer. As the story unfolds, their friendship is tested over the years by careers, relationships, distance, jealousy, and different visions for life. C.C. pursues fame and success on stage, while Hillary steps away from a high-powered legal career to raise a family and become a mother. They drift apart at times, hurt each other deeply, and reconnect again and again.

Near the end of the film, Hillary becomes terminally ill and C.C. ends up helping raise Hillary’s daughter. In the final scenes, C.C. is left looking back over their lives together—realizing how much her friend shaped her life, how she was always there, always supporting, always giving. As C.C. cares for Hillary’s daughter after her death, the movie leaves you with this picture of sacrificial love that continues even after loss.

And that’s when the sound of Bette Midler’s voice comes, and the song that became almost an overnight sensation, 1990 Song of the Year, and a worldwide hit: Did you ever know that you're my hero, and everything I would like to be? I can fly higher than an eagle, 'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

If you are wondering, yes, this is the first Bette Midler song I have ever referred to and yes, this is the softest introduction I have ever done. The things we do for mothers!

The song is a great tribute to those who sacrifice for others to help them stand strong, achieve great things, and live fruitful and fulfilling lives. As great as mothers are, and as much as we want to honor them and the way they emulate that sacrifice, we ultimately need someone greater than our earthly mothers. Mothers need a source of strength, and we ultimately look to the Lord for that.

Everyone wants a fruitful and fulfilling life, and for that we need direction and sustenance. In this passage, Jesus tells us how we find that. It's great to have people in our lives that inspire and help us, but ultimately we need the Lord. Here are three things about fruitfulness.

1. Fruitfulness Comes Through Sacrifice

Love is expressed through sacrifice. You’ve never heard it said, “Boy, I can tell he loves me by the way he bosses me around and tells me to do things.” Love is expressed by what we are willing to give up, what we sacrifice for the other, and by what we are willing to do to support them—denying ourselves so that they may be fulfilled. We give up a new truck so the kids can learn algebra.

“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” (v. 13)

I want to point this out because we live in a society that avoids doing hard things—a society that is unwilling to inconvenience itself for another person. Marriage is "too big a commitment." Kids? "No way." We are living in one of the loneliest and least resilient generations in history, and perhaps part of the reason is that people are conditioned to avoid sacrifice. We pursue convenience over commitment, freedom over responsibility, and comfort over costly love.

We don't experience the greatness of love because we refuse to love others when it is inconvenient and costly. Being a mom means entering a life of being inconvenienced. It is entering a life of the greatest love you will ever express because it is the greatest opportunity to lay down your life for others. It brings you into being more like Jesus.

We see modern attitudes and priorities expressed in the lack of commitment, lack of sacrifice, and yes, lack of a desire to be a parent. The U.S. fertility rate hit a record low in 2023–2025, continuing a nearly 20-year decline. More and more people are choosing not to have kids. The cultural mandate is to go and be fruitful, to multiply and have dominion. It is a basic part of what God calls people to do. Even here, Jesus said: “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide...” (v. 16)

We are called to be fruitful for the Lord, and it requires great sacrifice. People want rich and rewarding lives, but they are not willing to sacrifice for them—yet that is the only way to acquire things that are worthwhile. We live in a time when people feel they can just opt out of community. But meaningful relationships come at a cost of time and money. Marriage, parenting, and friendship are all "inconvenient."

Learn to love. Learn to sacrifice. Learn to bear with others. Learn to be there for them. Don’t opt out. Don't say, "I don't hang out with others, I don't go to church, I don't connect with others," and then wonder why your parenting feels so difficult. Let the church shape you. Let it guide you. Go all in. Build relationships.

2. Fruitfulness Requires Nourishment

I typically don't like to do things that I can't do. Don't put 400 lbs on a bench and expect me to press it. Don't expect me to sing a song. So, how do I find the strength to lay down my life for others? By looking to Jesus.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” (v. 5)

The good news is that you can find nourishment in Jesus. He invites us into a relationship of sustenance. If I told you I had a pill that you could take any time life got hard to replenish you and make sense of the struggle, you would be an addict. We need that replenishment, but it doesn't come through a pill; it comes through a relationship with Jesus.

Fruitfulness requires love, and love requires replenishing. Where do you find a reservoir of reason to give yourself to another? Modern atheists have trouble with this, which is likely why there is such a short supply of love in today's anti-Christian culture. Jesus is pointing you to a life in Him, the source of life. A branch is nourished by the vine; it supplies food, water—life. Jesus supplies the spiritual nourishment we need to obey and follow Him, and we come to Him by faith.

You don't need to have scored in the 90th percentile of mothers last week in order to receive. You don't need to fit into the mold of what others expect of you. Don't wait to get things "right" to come to Him. It's like saying you need to get in shape before you go to the gym. You just have to come to Him.

Your fruitfulness is dependent on remaining in Jesus. It depends not on your performance, but your reliance.

It's not about getting everything right. If you hit all the right notes, that's a performance you might boast about. But in life, you will miss things. You will mess up. You can ask for forgiveness. You can trust God to redeem your mistakes. You are not hopeless. It's not about being better than others. Comparison and envy are birthed out of a desire to be worshiped. It's not about having life carefully scripted so you can shine; it’s about giving up human efforts to achieve divine ends.

Nourishment is not about your performance, but your reliance.

Come to Him thirsty and needing direction. We are invited to "abide" in Him. What does that mean? It’s not a mystical "emptying" of the mind like modern yoga. An empty mind is hollow, and hollow things are not strong. Strengthen your mind by adding the solid rock of God’s Word.

“If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.” (v. 7) “If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love...” (v. 10)

There is a clear connection between abiding in Jesus and reading, praying, and obeying His Word. Don’t over-spiritualize the Christian faith. Can you meet with Jesus anywhere? Yes. But He also gives you disciplines to guide and replenish you. Jesus gives a command to love sacrificially, and He supplies the motivation.

Life drains you of love. The Gospel fills you.

Consider the eternal Trinitarian relations. The Father, Son, and Spirit have eternally loved each other. They have eternally been in community and lovingly obedient to one another. From eternity, they devised a plan of salvation. You were chosen. You are loved from eternity.

When you are waking up at 3:00 AM to feed a baby, or waiting for a teen to come home past curfew and your supply of love is short, this is where you go. When you have to correct a child for the 1,000th time, you can find a fresh supply of grace here. People are finite; their love is finite. The love of your mother will only motivate you to go as far as she did. Only Jesus loved you to the very end—the fullest extent of giving His life for you.

Many people stop "doing church" because they see it as a performance. But church isn’t a performance; their attitude toward it is. They are trying to prop up an image of themselves rather than coming as someone in need of saving. Jesus as Savior means you give up trying to make yourself look good. If you were drowning in the ocean and He pulled your dead carcass from the bottom and breathed life back into you, you wouldn't wake up and ask, "How is my hair? Do I look OK?"

Brother, you were dead at the bottom of the lake. You had nothing. Our hearts are dark and ugly. Trying to hide that is like putting makeup on a pig. We do that foolishness until we realize He knows our innermost thoughts and still offers us forgiveness. That’s when you can admit your inadequacies. Don't stay home because things "aren't good." The gym is where you are changed, and the church is the place that catalyzes your relationship with Jesus.

3. Fruitfulness Requires Pruning

There is only one hero who was perfect; everyone else is "in process." Those who are perfect deserve worship. Those “in process” require humility.

It takes humility to say, "I'm not there yet. I need Him to make me more like Him." When you are proud, you resent pruning. It feels hurtful or unneeded. But Jesus says: “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser... every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.” (v. 1-2)

If you have ever worked with vines, you know pruning is essential. You see wild scuppernongs on trails in August—they grow twenty feet up a tree and drop grapes. Don't eat those; they are small, sour, and bitter. They have not been pruned.

In life, you will be broken down. You will be stretched beyond your limit. It is then you have to trust God. If you could do everything yourself, you wouldn't need a Savior. God prunes us. Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes we lose things we thought we needed. But He wants us to bear more fruit. That pruning causes us to go deeper. If you want to be stagnant in life, avoid doing costly things.

Submit yourself to the Lord’s work. Don't resent it. Relational disappointment is a part of life. Every relationship will eventually disappoint you, which ultimately teaches you the love of Jesus. We turned from Him, yet He gave up His life for us. No one experienced more "church hurt" than Him.

Your heavenly Father is the vinedresser. He knows what He is doing. When I bought a house in Maryland, I trimmed some giant cedar bushes back to create a hedge. I trimmed below the lowest branch, not knowing that on cedar trees, they never come back if you do that. I killed them all. But your life is not in my hands; it is in the hands of your perfect Father. Trust Him when life doesn't make sense.

Living things grow. Growing things change.

Don’t resent the Lord’s pruning. Missing Jesus doesn't lead to a "less ideal" life—it’s not like getting a 4-star resort instead of a 5-star one. The text says those who do not remain are cut off. Turning from Him is running toward destruction. The greatest thing you can do for yourself is to delight in Jesus, abide in Him, and savor the Savior.

The Lord desires that you be fruitful. Bearing fruit is God’s primary creative and redemptive purpose. Turn to Christ. He makes it all possible. He nourishes, guides, helps, leads, prunes, and heals you. You have a friend in Jesus. You have a Savior. Not an inspirational song, not a sappy movie, not even a wonderful—albeit finite—mother. You have an eternal Savior.

So, find your rest in Him even when life is busy and you feel unacceptable. When your efforts to please others go unseen, know that He loves you. Let your children see a mother, a teacher, and a leader who hopes squarely in the Lord.

If you want to bear fruit:

• Commit your life to Christ.

• Rededicate your life to Christ.

• Give your life so that others might know Jesus.

Discussion Questions

1. Where in your life is God calling you to love sacrificially rather than choose comfort or convenience?

2. What are some practical ways we “abide in the vine” and remain spiritually nourished in Christ?

3. Looking back, how have you seen God use pruning, hardship, or sacrifice to produce greater fruit in your life?

4. Who do you know who might need to hear the message of the Gospel this week?